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Black Friday: The Good, The Bad, and The Psychotic

Brace yourselves. Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. That means Black Friday is coming. Moms everywhere are gearing up for the most violent day of the year. Tears and blood will be shed. Dreams will be broken. Heroes will be born.

Discounts. Discounts everywhere.

This high concentration of good deals turn little old ladies into demons with shopping carts. They push and run and shove… sometimes they even bite! And why? In the name of Christmas. Peace on Earth. Goodwill toward men. Pick an empty phrase, any empty phrase. I’m sure Jesus is so psyched that we begin the season of his birth by killing each other over material possessions.

But really, Black Friday is great. It gives businesses the opportunity to get “in the black” as they say. It’s also a great bonding opportunity for some families… the ones who I assume to be less violent. Because not everyone goes absolutely nuts. Last year, I ventured to Target with my siblings at 10 o’clock at night on Thanksgiving… That’s one thing that has changed over time. People can’t even wait until midnight to kill each other anymore. Black Friday sales start BEFORE Black Friday! Anyway, back to the story.

2012. Black Friday shopping. Target. Fort Wayne, Indiana. I went in expecting reenactments of scenes from Jingle All the Way (with or without the Governator) but instead, it was just really, really crowded. And I never found a Turbo Man…

The worst part was waiting in line to check out. Good gravy. After two solid hours of standing behind an older couple (they were very handsy, I might add…. We’re talking PDA level 99) I bought a hat, a t-shirt, and some Sour Patch Kids, none of which were on sale. What can I say? I have expensive taste… Anyway, do I have a point here?

Black Friday shopping has become part of our culture. It’s like its own holiday in some respects! But it’s strange. Definitely one of those things I will never fully understand. Maybe it’s because I’ve never been a “bargain hunter.” If I like it and it also happens to be reasonably priced, I’ll buy it. But does it occur to people that they don’t HAVE to buy it just because it’s on sale? If it’s a gift or whatever that you KNOW someone wants, then yeah, go for it. But do you honestly need a new 60-inch TV to replace last year’s 55-incher? Come on, people. Tisk, tisk.

When this toy store of mine becomes tangible, I’m bound to have some Black Friday deals of my own. Now, will people camp out all day waiting for the stroke of midnight? (or 10 at night… or 4 in the afternoon or whatever the trend becomes…) Who knows.

This year I’m going to be brave and venture back out into the chaotic consumer crossfires. Toys R Us will most likely be my venue. I’ll observe and report my findings…. And yeah, probably walk away with a few more toys to add to the continuous heap in my bedroom. Expect a vlog on the subject (the shopping experience, not the toys I keep in my bedroom), maybe even some raw footage from the battlefield?!

Wish me luck!!

Comments

  1. The whole Black Friday idea slightly reminds me of a series of popular books I’ve read. What were they? Oh yeah. The Hunger Games.
    Let’s throw some kids in an arena to fight .
    Let’s lure in crazy shoppers that’ll end up killing each other.
    Just an observation I’ve made about it.

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