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Why Slip ‘N Slides are the Best Thing that Ever Happened to Summer

The sun beats down on an arid, neighborhood. Staying inside in the AC feels like a waste of summer, but if you go outside, there is no oxygen… only the thick, putrid stench of your own relentless sweat. You can only lie there, face down in the grass, baking in the sun. In the distance the Johnson kids can be heard splashing around in their new pool. They sound so happy… and cool. Your tongue is swollen with thirst and you know there is an abundance of water inside the house but all you can think about is the blistering sunlight and the Johnsons’ pool and you’ve forgotten what it’s like to breathe, and how to be happy, and how to ride a bike which is ridiculous because they always say you never forget how to ride a bike but they are wrong because they’ve never been this hot before and you know that if you tried to ride a bike your legs would turn into jelly and melt all over the place and then dad would have to wash the driveway which would be a pain because he would have to find the hose—

HOSE.

A common garden hose provides the essential water supply that flows through any Slip ‘N Slide, the very veins of summer itself. Forget the Johnsons and their pool. You have your very own waterpark in your backyard!

There are so many fantastic things that make a Slip ‘N Slide a Slip ‘N Slide. Where do I start? Waiting for your turn to shoot across the lawn on a wet piece of plastic is like waiting for a rollercoaster at a theme park.

Dangerous? Yeah probably. But what fun would it be if you COULDN’T go flying off the thing and get grass burns up and down your body?? Everyone wants to be the fastest Slip ‘N Slide-r, especially when there’s an audience… and there WILL be an audience. As a kid, I remember getting our Slip ‘N Slide out and suddenly there would be five extra kids in the yard. Half of the time I don’t think I even knew them, but it’s basic math….

Summer + Slip ‘N Slide = Party

And everyone is invited.

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